One of my favourite people that ever lived was the majestic Frank Sidebottom. A bumbling 35 year old failure who was self delusional enough to believe he actually had a showbiz career, which he had to keep secret from his mum . Oh yeah, he also had a big head, that some people thought may have been made of papier mache. How rude. I’ve been a huge Frank fan since I was 15 and a few years ago I was lucky enough to appear on his TV show, easily the highlight of my professional life.
Well, at last someone is making a documentary about Mr.Sidebottom and his friend Chris Sievey. It’s being funded, as everything is these days, by the mighty Kickstarter. Director Steve Sullivan has reached his initial target of £20,000, so the film is definitely happening. But to make it as good as it can be, he needs more cash. If you’re feeling generous, then do pop a few sheckles in his metaphorical electronic pocket.
Ross Kemp is everyone’s favourite East End hard man. Well, after Danny Dyer. Of course. But you can’t fold Dyer’s face as easily as perhaps you’d like. The reluctant Mitchell brother, on the other hand, is far more malleable and looks wonderful when he’s all scrunched up. Just take a look at some of the wonderful examples on Kempfolds.
Like most people, I always leave my online Christmas shopping until the last possible minute, occasionally missing the postage deadline meaning my children don’t get any presents and we have to pretend we are Sikh and don’t celebrate it. If only there was a handy way of keeping an eye on exactly when Christmas was that I could check any time I was sat at a computer. Hang on a second, you mean THERE IS? Thank you Berners-Lee. THIS is what the internet was made for. Idiots like me.
Christmas is fine. That’s covered. We know when it is, sometime towards the end of December, and thanks to the previous site, we can accurately predict it. But the thing that makes me wasn’t to gouge my stomach out with a spork, is coming into work on a Wednesday only to be asked if I enjoyed pancakes the night before. ‘No, why would I’ is my usual response. ‘Because it was Pancake Day you massive has been loser, didn’t you know?’ I have missed Pancake Day every day for the last 32 years. And as we all know, these delicious flat cakes of the pan can only be eaten on this special day when we celebrate the Baby Jesus hunting in the back of the fridge for a squeezy plastic lemon left over from last year. Well, miss pancakes no more! Simply click on this next link every day until it says ‘Yes’.
I may have mentioned Axe Cop before, but to be honest, I don’t care. It is so good it is definitely worth another look. Basic premise, a young 9 year old boy (although he’s probably a bit older now. In fact, biology and aging would mean he definitely is) makes up stories about a gentleman called Axe Cop. He tells them to his older brother, who happens to be an excellent cartoonist. Older brother then makes one of the best comics based on the younger lads stories. The result is as mad and as brilliant as you’d expect.
Don’t click on this next link. This was considered hilariously funny back in the old days of the internet. I remember literally standing in a puddle of my own wee wee in 1999, thinking that we had reached the pinnacle of comedy and that we should stop trying to be funny.
Finally, who doesn’t want to look like Kenny Rogers? If at least one of my boys doesn’t end up with silvery hair and a bushy beard just like the Islands in the Stream superstar, then I will have failed as a father. Just imagine how proud the parents of these gentlemen must feel.
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That’s it for now. Do please keep sending me your websites. I don’t have a proper job so I need something to keep me off the streets. Pop along to www.facebook.com/iainleeofficial
You can read Iain Lee’s very own take on the internet here on the 123-reg blog every third Friday of the month.
A familiar face on television since he got his first break landing the job hosting Channel 4’s thrice weekly topical comedy show the 11 O’Clock Show at the age of 25, Iain is also an award winning radio presenter, top podcast creator and a genuinely funny guy with an eye for the bizarre.